On to better news...

Judy Woodruff steps down as host of Inside Politics today. Crossfire ends its run as well.

Join Bob Novak, James Carville, Paul Begala and a very special guest for Crossfire, 4:30 p.m. Eastern, 1:30 p.m. Pacific - live from the George Washington University.

Starting Monday make sure to tune into Inside Politics (3:30-5p ET), where Bob, James and Paul will continue their colorful and insightful analysis of the political and social issues of the day.

Natalie Portman vows not to do musicals.

The 23-year-old star is full of admiration for the hunky Scot - who is currently starring in London's West End production of GUYS AND DOLLS - but she insists her singing voice is took week for daily live performances.

But she is more than impressed with McGregor's vocal talents: "He's got a fantastic singing voice and he's so different from how he was in Moulin Rouge!.

"I'm not sure if I'd want to do a musical. I can't vouch for how good my own voice is."

I wouldn't want to do a musical either. I play guitar and also do musical comedy as well.

Jerry Springer seems to also have a crush on Natalie Portman. For a guy that bounced a check...

At Wednesday night's party for his new weekday Air America show, Springer on the Radio, the 61-year-old trash-television host sounded positively gaga over the 23-year-old Star Wars starlet.

"Natalie Portman is really bright, and if I was allowed to have one crush, it would be her," Springer told Lowdown.

Portman's PR rep responded: "I am not going anywhere near this whole thing."

Springer added that the actress could be his co-host, despite her apparent lack of talk-radio chops. "You know what? We'd work it out."

And who could serve as the new host of the Jerry Springer Show, which is now enjoying its 15th season of Geneva Convention-flouting torture and humiliation?

"Natalie Portman!" Springer answered - not that he has any intention of giving up the gig that has made him a millionaire many times over.

"Or Woody Allen," Springer added. "Anyone could do it. Anyone. All I do is, I go, 'You did WHAT?' 'Come on out!' 'We'll be right back.' A dolt could do what I do."

Second City has Georgia on its Mind.

The lineup features Chicago's Second City improv ensemble. Second City alums include the late John Belushi, Mike Myers, Bill Murray and the late Gilda Radner. The current troupe performs at 9 p.m.

(Note: Suwanee advises this is aimed at an adult audience. "While Second City ensemble members avoid much of the adult language frequently associated with comedians, the performance should be considered a PG-13 rating at minimum," event organizers said in a release.)

Nothing lasts Forveer. Evidently, diamonds are sold seperately.

Ashcroft wants pro-life candidate in 2008. Evidently, that doesn't include pro-legal rights.

Belushi and Aykroyd are performing at Horseshoe Casino's Bluesville next week. I'd do anything to see them live. Okay, so not ANY thing...