Top Ten Reasons Regis Philbin Is Not On The Show Tonight

10. I'm not available
9. I'm out of town
8. Just not interested
7. You know, I never really cared for the show
6. I'm waiting for the exterminator
5. I gotta do a thing -- anything
4. I'm just not a fan
3. It's the digital TV switchover
2. Honestly, I don't feel like it
1. Frankly, it's none of your business

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