Jon Stewart appeared last night as a guest of Bill O'Reilly on his FOX News show, The O'Reilly Factor. Here's the transcript.
Some things of interest:
BILL O'REILLY: How is President Obama doing so far?
STEWART: You know, I'm torn. There — for me, I feel like I can't tell if he's a Jedi master playing chess on a three-level board way ahead of us, or if this is kicking his ass, so…
O'REILLY: You really don't know?
STEWART: For one thing, those types of broad analysis, you know, how's he doing? It doesn't lend itself to a very easy answer. I think there are certain areas that he seems to have made progress or stabilized certain areas. I'm appreciative of the fact that he has tried to reengage the regulatory mechanism of the government.
O'REILLY: Wow, the regulatory mechanism.
STEWART: Regulatory mechanism.
O'REILLY: That's way over my head.
STEWART: The mechanism.
O'REILLY: What is that?
STEWART: And you're 6'5".
O'REILLY: Yeah, and I have no idea what you just said.
STEWART: So that's like I was throwing a Marques Colston.
STEWART: I mean, that was like jumping out there.
O'REILLY: So, what is that?
STEWART: The idea that we would have people there checking if there was lead in our toys, that kind of stuff.
O'REILLY: OK, so protecting the folks using the federal government's power, he's made strides in doing that? You know, that's a pretty smart analysis. You know, a lot of people don't think you're smart.
STEWART: Thank you very much.
O'REILLY: Did your writers come up with that or did you?
STEWART: No. They're in my pocket.
O'REILLY: All right, so you think he's doing OK in some areas?
STEWART: Certain jobs.
O'REILLY: And not OK in others. Give me a not OK.
STEWART: I think he has decided that Congress is an equal branch of government. Huge mistake. You can't just walk in there as the next guy and say, let's go back to…
O'REILLY: Power sharing.
STEWART: …three equal branches.
O'REILLY: No good.
STEWART: You got to go in there, my friends. Oh, you want to pass a law I don't like? Signing statement. Here's how we're going to do health care, boom, boom, boom. You don't like it? You get in line.
O'REILLY: So he's too much of a team player.
STEWART: It allows too much room for different narratives to take hold. For instance, a narrative that might emanate from, you know…
O'REILLY: The No Spin Zone, from here…
STEWART: From a news organization.
O'REILLY: You know, that's actually another astute point. And you've shocked me twice now with the regulatory thing...
STEWART: By the way, did you notice I used the word ilk?
O'REILLY: I did, I but I ignored it. But anyway, so you say that President Obama…
O'REILLY: ...instead of driving home a few pieces of legislation so that everybody can understand what he's doing...
STEWART: That's right. Using the bully pulpit (INAUDIBLE).
O'REILLY: …gathers too many people under the tent. And there's too much discussion.
STEWART: That's right.
O'REILLY: Thereby leading to too much sniping and you don't get anything done.
STEWART: If you allow too much nitpicking on the edges of legislation, it will be necessarily turned into a type of lobbyist gruel.
O'REILLY: Lobbyist gruel.
STEWART: Lobbyist gruel. That's the porridge that the lobbyists would eat.
STEWART: Without making a strong case to the public, you have no leverage because the real power takes place behind…