Top Ten Signs You are Sitting Next to the Pope in Synagogue
10. When he tells you his last name is Ratzinger, you ask if he is related to the Ratzingers in Boro Park
9. Asks who won the Cardinals Game last night
8. Two Words: Yarmulke Envy
7. Finally have the perfect audience for your "A priest, a rabbi walk into a bar" joke
6. You hand him a Hertz Chumash because you think he'll appreciate the Roman numerals
5. Says the 2 seats next to him are reserved for his Father and his Son
4. At Kiddush club, Pope makes b-line to communion wafers a.k.a. TamTams
3. Torah reading describes Ark of Covenant, Pope whispers "Sounds like something I have in my basement"
2. During moment of silence for the Holocaust, you whisper "Guess you guys are used to this"
1. When rabbi speech goes on for more than 30 minutes, he mumbles "Jesus..."
Top Ten Jewish April Fools Day Pranks
10. Change status on Facebook to Engaged (kudos kustanowitz!)
9. Untie 1 knot of tzitzit - when friend puts them on, Bracha Lvatala!
8. Announce that all Subway restaurants have gone kosher
7. Post room on Bangitout.com, unsubtlely forward to roommate
6. Two words: Superglue Shaitel
5. Post birth on onlysimchas.com (you and your boyrfiend's)..extra points if baby picture is not caucasian....or circumcised
4. Start rumor that Matisyahu is not religious anymore
3. Subscribe your irreligious friend up for every torah email list on earth
2. Tell husband you're a Niddah
1. Freak out Rabbi ...show up for minyan on time
And a list of movies coming to a theatre near you.