Saturday, December 10, 2005

Alec Baldwin hosts Saturday Night Live

Twelve times as host now. This should be great. Shakira is the music guest.

Cold Opening (Iraqi Compound) - Alec Baldwin plays Saddam Hussein. Fred Armisen plays the guard. He complains about the flights. He complains about the 4 flights. Ramsey Clark's name and client list are mentioned "Having Ramsey Clark as your lawyer is like going to a bar with Tom Sizemore." Baldwin recites the famous sentence: "Live from New York, it's Saturday Night!"

Monologue - "Only Steve Martin has hosted more times than me." Steve first hosted in 1976. Baldwin's first time was in 1990. John Goodman hosted 12 times. Tom Hanks has hosted 7 times but he's too busy. David Spade's advice took him 3 more shows. Who could forget the Schweaty balls. He noticed Tim Meadows was gone during his 9th or 10th show. Tim Meadows makes a cameo appearance. ("I'm still in the cast, I haven't had any sketches in 6 years but I'm back. This monologue has broken my slump.") He brings up his 11th time where he mentions something.

Commercial - Baldwin does a commercial for Tylenol BM. Rachel is also in that commerical.

Face Transplant - Tina makes a rare sketch appearance. This deals with the recent face transplant. Looks like Seth Meyers plays the wife. Baldwin complains about the swelling. Baldwin asks for forgiveness when he wants to body reject the face. Rachel plays the 2nd time that the face has a transplant. Baldwin pulls the tube. The next face belongs to Kenan Thompson. The doctor calls him a racist. The very next day, the face belongs to Amy Poehler. He grabs Amy's you know what. Apparently, his wife died.

Fox News - Bill O'Reilly played by Darrell Hammond. The subject is torture. "Geneva Conventions should stay in Convention." Joining is John McCain (Chris Parnell or Jason Sudeikis). O'Reilly says he is a convicted felon. He calls him a racist for bringing up the fact he was captured by the Vietnamese. Congressman Barney Frank is played by Alec Baldwin. Bill asks him to use his real voice. "Secular progressive movement." Frank applauds Parliament. O'Reilly brings up the band headed by George Clinton. Frank: "You are wrong in so many ways I am actually concerned for you, Bill." O'Reilly accuses Peter Jackson of not being creativity. Arvin Ejaz of Cincinnati? James Ahearn of Olney, MD? I wonder if these people are real. That second letter was hilarious.

Robert Smigel Cartoon (Celebrity Mugshot Poker) - Quite a few celebrities and non-celebrities. Tom Delay is playing for the Very Good Cause foundation. The Carolina Panthers cheerleaders folded and take a 4th bathroom break. This sketch is not very funny at all.

Brokeback Goldmine - This features Alec Baldwin and Will Forte. Rachel Dratch is also in this sketch. Almost reminds me of the Cantina boy sketch. I hope I have the title right. Definitely a trailer for a show.

Shakira sings one of her songs.

Weekend Update - I expect a tribute to Richard Pryor. Starts off with a Bush joke and a Cheney joke. Iran plans to build some nuclear power plants apparently. Hussein joke. World News Tonight and SNL has the audition tapes featuring Wolf Blitzer (Chris Parnell), Jane Pauley (Kristen Wiig), Stan Mather (Darrell Hammond), Stuart Scott (Finesse Mitchell), Ty Pennington (Seth Meyers), and Gene Shalit (Horatio Sanz). The National Zoo has seen increase in sales and the panda's name Ka-Ching Ka-Ching. 32JJ is a record. Rumsfeld advised Army to not give enough eqiuipment for the football. CBJB's owes money for rent. Cruise and Holmes expecting a boy. Dolphins depressed in Honduras? Apparently Tina's father, Doug, contributed a joke. Kenan Thompson plays Sharif Omar Mohammed. "Free Tookie!" Britain has introduced a musical sandwich. Starbucks violation? Amy plans to start up Dunkin Dog Nuts. Weight loss spa in Hong Kong. Now the tribute to Richard Pryor almost thirty years to the date of his first apperance on SNL

Tony Bennett Show - Baldwin's recurring character and he sings as usual. His first guest is Dick Cheney (Darrell Hammond). They both are singing "Santa Claus is Coming to Town" with the fake smile as usual. Interesting rendition though. I've got no comment on the song though. I will say I prefer Adam Sandler singing...

Carol - Baldwin, Amy, Jason Sudeikis. Horatio Sanz as the recurring character, Carol. This sketch will not be on when E! reruns it. I really am not a fan of this recurring sketch. It's not funny.

Jeremy Conners - What's up with Alec Baldwin married to a hot dog. He mentions Pat Morita died. Amy Poehler is half-dog, half-girl. Andy Samberg is half-dog, half-man. How a man can have sex with a hot dog is beyond me.

Medicare - Jeremy Sudeikis starts this one out. He's singing too. This deals with prescription drugs. Nice PSA sketch.

Shakira sings again.

Santa's Workshop - Amy, Rachel, Seth, Fred, and Alec are in this one. They get fired, wait that was a false alarm. They get holiday bonuses in the end.

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